summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
