my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize