oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
