so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
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