Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize
