the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
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