Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
no you cant smoke seaweed
He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
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