This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
my sisters under your porch take her home
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
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