it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
God, I missed his penis.
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