I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
Randomize
