Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize
