I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
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