Have you finally orgasmed yet?
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
It's like God shit irony all over that family
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Randomize