I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
Randomize
