My sheets look like a crime scene.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
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