I want to make a zoo with you.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
