We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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