the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
That's how pantless uber rides happen
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
