yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
