you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize