i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
I have already put on my inside pants.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
