Taylor Swift is so right about you.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Randomize
