Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Randomize