Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
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