she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Randomize
