I'm pants shitting drunk right now
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
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