we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Randomize
