Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
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