No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
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