you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Randomize
