this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
