i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
porn star boner night. come get it.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
