Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Randomize
