i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
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