some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
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