I feel like abortions should bother me more
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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