how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
Is Oprah even human
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
Randomize
