Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I wish I only lived at night.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
