***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
I think i ate a live goldfish last night. that i caught with my hand in a kiddie pool. my stomach really hurts.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
Randomize
