i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize
