508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
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