Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
what is it with giant penises always finding me
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
