I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
