I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
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