I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
You can't motorboat a personality
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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