He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
