Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
