ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
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