the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
Randomize
