she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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