3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
