when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Randomize
