That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
Randomize
